do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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