Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
