What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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