Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Randomize
