Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
