More tranny stories later!
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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