I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
where are you?
Hypothermia
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize