It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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