dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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