I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize
