Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
