I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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