WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
