Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
