i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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