No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
