like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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