3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
