No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize