Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
where does the pee come out of this thing
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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