You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
