I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
40s are totally the cure
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter