You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
Randomize