He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
