I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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