Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
