don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
