it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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