She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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