I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
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Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize