after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
