Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
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Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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