I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
