Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
