Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize