My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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