we're chasing vodka with high fives
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize