How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
