Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
