On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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