How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
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