Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
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The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
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But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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