so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
