ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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