ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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