"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
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words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
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Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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