I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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