Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
