Texts From Last Night

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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.

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  (217): I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello. http://tfl.nu/7dqs
  Replies (14) Good night (2098) Bad night (583)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again

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  (973): At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again http://tfl.nu/dnym
  Replies (6) Good night (1059) Bad night (548)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out

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  (303): oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out http://tfl.nu/89b7
  Replies (16) Good night (797) Bad night (3620)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.

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  (513): his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick. http://tfl.nu/h0yf
  Replies (18) Good night (1369) Bad night (5020)
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  (607): View more from New York

  please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already

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  (607): please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already http://tfl.nu/5kxb
  Replies (8) Good night (2958) Bad night (1524)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.

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  (630): whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch. http://tfl.nu/lo8i
  Replies (5) Good night (2372) Bad night (1260)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity

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  (215): Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity http://tfl.nu/eokb
  Replies (5) Good night (1954) Bad night (806)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.

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  (989): He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT. http://tfl.nu/p01t
  Replies (8) Good night (702) Bad night (2068)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way

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  (805): You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way http://tfl.nu/xnwc
  Replies (6) Good night (1922) Bad night (716)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.

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  (208): Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult. http://tfl.nu/xgis
  Replies (2) Good night (532) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.

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  (803): Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation. http://tfl.nu/hr81
  Replies (2) Good night (1533) Bad night (500)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit

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  (716): Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit http://tfl.nu/28c7
  Replies (4) Good night (383) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?

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  (615): Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport? http://tfl.nu/4yvq
  Replies (8) Good night (859) Bad night (402)
• Favorite

  (984): View more from North Carolina

  I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?

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  (984): I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal? http://tfl.nu/izvy
  Replies (3) Good night (547) Bad night (256)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.

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  (732): Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole. http://tfl.nu/eueb
  Replies (6) Good night (482) Bad night (316)

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