TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
So much rum. So many feels.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
