I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
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