Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
