so explain again why im purple
no
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
